Your Playlist for Life
Create your own PLAYLIST FOR LIFE with stories about the how, the when, the why?
Your Playlist for Life — What Would You Want to Hear?
When I was studying to become a Death Doula, I somehow stumbled across a UK organisation called Playlist for Life.
They had developed their work around something that really resonated with me: music can be incredibly powerful for people living with dementia.
Music can connect us with memories, emotions, people and places. A particular song can transport you back decades in an instant. You might not remember someone’s name, what you had for breakfast, or even where you are — but suddenly a song comes on and you know every word.
That got me thinking…
Why do we only think about playlists as something we make for a party, a road trip or a workout?
Why not create a Playlist for Life?
And I’m not just talking about music.
What if your playlist was part of your end-of-life plan?
During COVID, I ran my first online series and introduced the idea of creating your own playlist.
As we talked about it, we started thinking:
Why limit ourselves to music?
What about:
🎵 Music
📚 Books
📝 Poetry
📺 TV shows
🎬 Movies
📻 Radio stations
🎧 Podcasts
Basically, anything you might want to hear, watch or experience if one day you aren’t able to choose it for yourself.
Because here’s the thing…
There may come a time when you can’t reach the remote.
You can’t tell someone what you’d like to watch.
You can’t change the radio station.
You can’t put your favourite song on.
You can’t advocate for yourself.
And that’s when having these things written down can become surprisingly important.
Have you ever noticed what’s playing in aged care?
I’ve lost count of the number of times I’ve seen someone in an aged care facility sitting in front of a television with the news — or some random program — playing.
And I’ve wondered:
Did they choose this?
Or did someone turn on the TV, put on whatever happened to be showing, and then leave it running?
Now, I’m not saying everyone wants music playing or a television on.
Some people might want complete silence.
And that’s exactly the point.
It’s your choice.
If you don’t want anything playing, put that down too.
But if you would like something, wouldn’t it be useful for the people caring for you to know what it is?
I know that if I were stuck in bed and couldn’t change the channel or turn something on or off, I’d want the people around me to know what I liked.
And I can tell you one thing…
I definitely wouldn’t want to spend the last years, months, weeks, days or hours of my life listening to the news!
My family has some very specific viewing requirements…
My stepdad, on the other hand, LOVES the news.
They’ll watch the early news.
Then the next news.
Then probably another news.
You get the picture.
I’ve jokingly told him that if he ever gets dementia, I’ll put The Big Bang Theory on and tell him it’s the news.
He absolutely hates The Big Bang Theory.
It’s an in-joke.
Don’t worry — he knows I’m terrible.
My Mum and John have their own viewing preferences too.
Afternoon quiz shows are definitely on the list.
And for John?
The footy. Obviously.
They also used to be avid Bold and the Beautiful watchers.
Except they called it The Bold & The Pig.
There’s a whole pig story behind that.
John gets called Piggy. We used to buy pig-related things. Eventually, many years ago, we had to stop buying pigs.
It’s a long story.
I digress…
But that’s exactly why these little details matter.
They’re not just lists.
They’re pieces of us.
Your playlist could tell your story
Imagine someone sitting beside your bed and knowing:
“She loves this song because it reminds her of travelling through Europe.”
“He always listened to this radio station on Saturday mornings.”
“This is their favourite movie.”
“They love old game shows.”
“Don’t put the news on!”
“This poem reminds them of their mum.”
“They want silence in the morning.”
Those details can help someone care for you in a way that feels more you.
And perhaps even more importantly, they give your family and friends a little glimpse into the things that make you tick.
So… what’s on YOUR Playlist for Life?
I reckon this could be a really fun thing to do with your family or friends.
The UK has National Playlist Day on 17 September, so why not use that as an excuse to have a night in with your favourite people?
Grab some snacks.
Put the kettle on.
Open your preferred music streaming/listening service — or dig out those old CDs, records or cassettes if you’re feeling vintage!
And each choose your Top 5 Songs.
But here’s the important bit:
Don’t just name the song.
Tell the story behind it.
Why is it one of your Top 5?
Who does it remind you of?
Where were you when you first heard it?
Did you dance to it?
Did it break your heart?
Did it get you through a difficult time?
Does it remind you of a particular person, place or moment?
You might discover something about someone you’ve known for years that you never knew before.
And you might discover a new song to add to your own Playlist for Life.
Or go BIG…
Would you create a mish-mash playlist of 100 songs?
One minute you’re listening to ABBA.
Then Cyndi Lauper, Cher, Pat Benetar.
Then something from a 1950s movie.
Then a bit of Beyoncé.
Then classical music.
Then something your kids would be mortified to know you like.
Then a bit of Dolly or the Rocky Horror Picture Show.
Personally, I just need to make one thing very clear:
NO HEAVY METAL SCREAMING SONGS FOR ME, PLEASE.
If I’m lying in bed unable to change the playlist, I don’t want someone screaming into my ear.
Thank you very much.
And here’s a little secret…
Want to know one of the songs on my Playlist for Life — and the story behind it?
I’m going to share it at the in-person launch of the song we created during the second event of my Conversations About Death & Dying four-part series.
It’s a pretty special song and there’s a story behind it but I have really mixed emotions about it now having learnt something.
If you’d like to know more about the launch, send me a message and I’ll give you the information.
And if you’re nowhere near Sydney and can’t make it in person…
Well…
I’m still thinking about how we might include you.
Perhaps I need to run an online event too?
Watch this space!
Start your Playlist for Life
You don’t have to wait until you’re old.
You don’t have to be sick.
You don’t have to be planning to die.
Start now.
Your Playlist for Life can be something you add to throughout your life.
And it can become a beautiful little map of who you are — the songs, stories, shows, books, poems, podcasts and sounds that have accompanied you along the way.
Because end-of-life planning isn’t just about what happens after you die.
It’s also about thinking about how you want to live — and how you want to be cared for — when you can no longer speak for yourself.
So…
What’s on your Playlist for Life?
And perhaps the more important question:
What definitely isn’t?
For more inspiration, check out the wonderful work of Playlist for Life and their National Playlist Day resources:
Playlist for Life – National Playlist Day
Now go put on a song that makes you happy.
And maybe write down why.
Keep in the loop and sign up for my maybe monthly newsletter which I am yet to create properly but if you do want to keep in touch email me at carkitcafe@gmail.com and I will add you to the list.
Spinning through life’s journeys,
Jewelz the Hoola Doola
Your guide to Destination Death